Dear reader,

Hello again and thank you kindly for tuning in. I’m just getting back from a brief tour up to Canada with Dante Elephante. Quite exhausted at the moment and just getting my bearings again. Trying to catch up on sleep.

At most when touring, if you track your sleep, it seems you get on average 4 to 5 hours. So you try and rest, nap, or find spots to lay your head whenever you can. Even if for only 10mins at a time.

Sleeping, some kind of movement and grabbing a shower. Those things you prioritize over all else.

So I’m logging on with a question I’ve been wrestling with for some time now.

Is Nashville or Los Angeles the next move? As a musician and artist, currently an independent contractor, which city and environment would be more ideal? Things I’ve been thinking about, asking about and weighing for some time.

I’m gonna leave a poll here, which I would love your input on. In addition I’ll share some quick thoughts I have on both cities. Both positives and negatives.

Let me know your honest opinion and thoughts, both in the poll but also feel free to comment as well! I’m genuinely curious and am interested in hearing from you all. No matter what your background.

As my therapist said, there likely isn’t a wrong answer, just the answer that is right for you right now. Truly either city would offer up inspiration and work, and frankly I wouldn’t mind living in either - depending on lifestyle as well as opportunity.

Having recently spent a little time in Nashville I can say with confidence that being in a city like that will sharpen your skills as a musician. Without a doubt. Whether you go further in your career is a toss up but to be around so many serious players is inspiring.

On the other hand, being in Los Angeles feels like a natural jump from where I am currently. With all of the connections I’ve built over the years in California and being able to continue to nurture those connections by staying on the west coast. It also feels in a way like I could be myself as an artist easier, but who knows.

Some quick pros and cons of Nashville:

Pros:

1. Affordability, cost of living

2. Accessibility, easier city to navigate (given its size and saturation)

3. Everyone there has a very high standard of playing, this professionalism has a trickle down effect that is a net positive

4. East Nashville has a more indie friendly DIY atmosphere, similar to East LA

5. Folks are very kind and open, at least based on my limited experience. There is a politeness

6. It’s very much music city, a songwriters town

7. The degrees of separation are much slimmer

Cons:

1. Over-saturation, so many killer players, highly competitive

2. Can’t gig like I can out here on the coast, it would be more broadway oriented and lower pay, until getting established in the session scene or picked up for touring

3. Lots of booze and tourism

4. The weather, four seasons but a lot of humidity, very hot during the summers

5. Not as many connections or friends, feeling potentially trapped

6. It would be more starting over then building on something

7. The commodification of music, though is true really every where there is industry

Some quick Pros and Cons of Los Angeles:

Pros:

1. Staying in California, close to the ocean, mountains and the nature I love

2. Nearer to and able to build on connections already made, connected to a few different scenes here, both directly and indirectly

3. Potentially easier to get work as a guitarist, though this is a toss up given how highly competitive LA is as well

4. I think I would stand out more as an artist/musician easier given how I’m not doing the same thing a lot of folks are, however this is more of a gut instinct

5. Being a part of what feels like a potential artistic/musical renaissance in LA

6. Staying connected to people I know and care for, miles and distance make everything harder, even in this day and age

Cons:

1. Higher cost of living

2. Traffic + congestion

3. Highly competitive, over saturation

4. Lack of accessibility, the city can be tuff to navigate

5. A lot of clout chasing, performative cliquey behavior, the moving target of “cool”, gate-keeping, though also true of a lot of industry towns

6. Potentially harder to break into, really a toss up

Both would require having a little scratch saved, potentially a day job lined up and a neighborhood decided on before hand.

The above positives and negatives are things I’ve just picked up on over the years. I’m not a spring chicken either, and while I’m in it for the long game, there are still things to consider given my late 30s vs had I made this move in my 20s.

As a guitar player, there are certain trends/sounds I like to be aware of. Everyone in LA is on the Blake Mills train, which don’t get me wrong, he is one of my favorite players/producers currently working, but by not being one of the players that is trying to do that same thing, I think I would stand out easier in LA vs Nashville..where more folks are cut from the very chord tone heavy Guthrie Trapp and Tom Bukovac camp. The million dollar chord and lick types.

Different preferences and priorities.

I’ve lived in three places my whole life, born in Connecticut, then moved out to Lompoc, CA when I was kid, now living in Santa Barbara. I think before I get to my 40s, another move feels healthy and needed. To shake things up, to get back to a place where I’m trying to support myself and art.

A mantra I try and say daily, or at least read is: Live the way you wanna live.

As a recovering people pleaser - my time, energy and space are things I hold very near and dear.

My mom said something to me 10 years ago now after a bad break up that always stuck with me as well.

She said:

“You have to be a hundred percent committed to you before you can commit to another.”

I always come back to that one.

Other things I actively tell myself these days are:

“It’s okay to not know.”

“Growth comes from being honest with yourself as well as with those around you, and continuing to do so.”

“I forgive, love and accept myself for having ocd/adhd and codependency. I’m grateful for the lessons these issues have taught me and the gifts they’ve given, and all I’m going to learn.”

Lastly from Codependent No More, by Melody Beattie (highly recommend):

“Keep track of what you do for others and what you do for yourself. Are you tending to your true responsibilities? Is there a healthy balance between what you do for yourself and others?”

These are all things that help me feel grounded again and in times where I might be feeling worn thing, lost or frustrated, it reminds me that I have the ability to make choices that allow me to get to where I’d like to be. At least that’s the idea.

With this move, it’s about getting out of my own way - which I’m quite prolific at, trying to not shoot myself in the foot anymore and get out of this barely keeping my head above water place I’ve been in for some time.

All things I’m working on and taking into consideration.

Anyhow I suppose that’s all for today, let me know what your thoughts are on the two different cities, curious to hear.

Also feel free to share this publication with anyone you think might find it interesting or useful. I’m working on continuing to grow on here, just as I hope we all are in general.

Wishing well out, till next time xoxo

~ JEC

Dear reader,

Hello again, and thank you so much for tuning in. It’s most certainly been a while. I do regret my radio silence over this last stretch but on some level I must of needed it. The past year has consisted of burn out, on going grief, juggling, changing gears, letting go, readjusting, rearranging, restoration, rediscovery and reorientation.

Currently I’m sitting in an airport in Portland Oregon, having just landed after a gig the night before in Santa Barbara. Maybe slept for an hour and half. Boarding was at 4:50am. Doing a last minute west coast run into Canada with Dante Elephante. We’re opening for a band called ‘Dumbo Gets Mad’ - a rock group out of Italy.

The flight was mostly uneventful, which I’m grateful for - other then sitting next to someone who’s sense of personal space was a little grey for my taste.

Happy to be back in the PNW. It always feels good up here, the air is cool and refreshing.

(Just as I find a suitable location to park it for a while, sip on coffee and try writing, a noisy gentleman sits directly behind me. Weird sounds from all around. Irrationally irritated.)

Lately my people skills have been suffering, or maybe its my patience...It feels like in general the older I get the more anti-social I become. This is not an intentional action but I’m sure this, in part, a reaction that has to do with how divided my time has been of late. Being aware of what you need is only half the game, acting on it and making it happen is often the harder task.

I’m trying to get back into the practice of being mindful of what there is to be grateful for again. Striking a better balance. It’s easy to get caught up in the circus of depression and the chaos of life. Even still, there are many things I can count as blessings.

Playing at a jazz club tonight in downtown Portland called Jack London Revue, a spot we actually haven’t played here before. Looking forward to it. Also given how heavy the Steely Dan influence is on this new music, it feels right.

Coffee is starting to wear off…

Recently I completed another trip around the sun. I guess not that recent, but when I originally started writing this it was closer to March. Birthdays though..are a funny thing. My own personal preference is to not make a fuss over it. A lot of times I’ll just work, or maybe take a quiet drive up the coast. A lot of what I do for a living involves planning, scheduling and such, so what is actually relaxing and important to me is prioritizing space and just letting things breathe. Letting things be. Waking up and doing nothing for a change. I have a fantasy of reading a book all day after a nice long walk, playing some guitar for myself and sipping on some coffee. That sounds like the perfect day right now. As Lou Reed croons in the background.

I love people watching. Especially in an airport. People are fascinating. I still feel often like an outsider in many ways. An alien that got jettisoned out from the mothership and crash landed on this little third stone from the sun.

Always somewhere to be, always something to do, always someone to please, always something to lose.

Finished recording guitar for the new Dante Elephante record last year, Ruben signed with new management, as well as our original booking agent got absorbed by a larger agency - long term that’s a good thing. It’ll be a minute before the album is out but the process is happening. A couple months back, we had our first gig in over a year down in Malibu at AV Dreamland. Opened for some artist named Yellow Days. Hadn’t heard of them before but they put on a good show. Nine piece band, loud as hell. Good rhythm section. Not something I’d listen to of my own accord but live is always a different thing. We’ve got this tour now up into Canada then a label showcase down in LA again the week after we get back.

The wheels are certainly turning again. After a little break. Not that last year was really a “break” but less heavy lifting with road work and instead we all focused on recording. Both for Dante, session work for various artists, and also trying to finish what has turned into almost three albums worth of material for myself, music I’m, partly proud of and then some I’m just completely over. It’s been a long time coming though, six years in the making at least. It’s been quite the mountain to climb. Trying to find little moments and funding to do it, between everything else.

Slowly been dripping that music out as singles but I’m ready to get it all done and get it all out. My word of the year is: Prioritize.

I was also recently got asked to do some songwriting for film/tv, I’m excited that one of the projects did end up getting a sync and hopefully as long as the tune makes the final edit, will be out sometime later this year or early next. Will talk more about this when able but for now I’ll just say I’m very grateful for the work and opportunity.

Speaking of touring, for the first time in almost five years it felt really good to take a needed respite from the road, it most definitely can wear you down. Even if you love it.

The break allowed me to take stock of where I’m at and do some thinking as to just where I’d like to be. It also made space, along with not drinking, for continuing to process both my mom and grandma passing. I guess it’s not surprising how much that is still affecting things on a pretty significant level. More than I sometimes care to acknowledge out loud. That’s partly why I stay so busy, and perhaps why things have felt more convoluted over the past two years…Due to how much grief is still there and how much I’m still processing it all. I feel like I’m running, or titrating. I can only turn the faucet on for so long before it becomes too much, but I am trying. Trying not to run anymore.

Trying to embrace the grief and loss when I can, as I can. As well as the inherent growth that comes along with that process. Trying to get back into the land of the living. Slowly but surely, small steps when able. It’s tedious but that’s how it goes I suppose.

God damn, I’m tired…I wonder if there is designated sleeping spot for folks in the airport? Maybe just wherever you find a couple seats to yourself.

I’m still doing the no drinking thing. Over a year sober now. It started out just needed a break and then it turned into a thing I don’t miss. There is a certain calm clarity about it that I enjoy.

Had a great time recently in Nashville. Just got back a couple weeks ago. Saw some sites, recorded some music, mostly though hit spots that felt more down home and less touristy. Met some personal heroes of mine, Guthrie Trapp to name one. Everyone there is so personable, it kinda throws you off at first. Compared to the clout chasing elsewhere. I mean, it’s still downright competitive as hell but the way folks approach it is different out there. That may be the most surprising thing.

The music of course was some of the best I’ve experienced ever, just makes you wanna play more and really get back to the joy of it all.

Lately I’ve been having to weigh another move. The house I was living in was on the market so I was getting ready to make a jump to Los Angeles or Nashville. The home situation changed though, for the better. It’ll give me a little wiggle room to finish some things while in Santa Barbara before making the jump to wherever is next.

Likely Los Angeles, it makes sense in a lot of ways. I’m like 60/40 on living in LA vs Nashville. Would love your input if you have any hot takes.

Anyhow the time feels right to shake the dust off this publication/newsletter/blog space and to get these damn gears turning again.

Look forward to catching up more. About to find some more coffee then meet up with the band at the venue for load in and sound check.

I’ll leave you with this, since this is my first post of the new year, something I wrote in my journal New Year’s Day that I just stumbled upon whilst looking back through old entries.

“When sharing a happy new year with someone, if written via text on a mobile device, those words would cause a series of explosive images that would illicit a potential response of warmth and excitement. Perhaps that all will be okay. Is that true anymore? In our culture of hustle and bustle it seems like something prescient has been lost. Something meaningful that we try to replace with one thing or another. Technology clumsily and woefully has robbed us of a unique ability to breathe and discern, but tries to supplement it in a painstakingly sterile and vapid way. Lack of tangible connection, hollow nutrition. Empty like a microwave dinner that says it’s organic. Offering up ease of use and convenience as a means to an end. Hold a hand and enjoy real human connection when you can”

Wishing well to y’all out there, talk to you soon xoxo

Well hello there dear reader,

I hope this finds you in a relatively good mood, and that you’re doing as good as can be. All things considered.

It’s been far too long.

My sincere apologies there.

All things being equal, I could be working more efficiently. Goals.

(It’s been raining quite a bit here in Santa Barbara. Loving it.)

This will be a shorter update then I’d like but time hasn’t been in my favor for this past year, so far..Hopefully that turns around soon. Partly I suppose I must own my part in that, but things have been quite chaotic since the start of 2025. I’ve been playing in quite a few bands lately to help pay the bills, the hired gun thing is fun but can be a lot of work. Lessons have been slow so far, hopefully that starts to turn around but you do what you gotta do to survive…suffice to say my health though hasn’t been in the best shape as a consequence of all this running around multiple candle burnings and such.

So for some updates:

If you happen to find yourself wandering into Solvang, CA tonight - My band (The Contenders) and I will be playing an overdue show to help celebrate the release of a couple new songs, both Waiting On Tomorrow and The Contender.

We’ll be playing at Lost Chord Guitars at 8pm. Doors at 7pm. 21 and up. $10 cover.

My friends Antigone Antigone (a folk duo outta LA) and Bradberri (an indie rock outfit from SB I play guitar for) will be joining/supporting.

We’ve got a couple new songs I’m excited to debut. One in particular I’m looking forward to demo’ing soon as well.

The Contenders for tonight will be: Jess Bush on keys, Wesley Hill on bass and my brother Samuel Cole on drums. Always grateful to play with this crew.

Maybe, quite possibly, and hopefully, see you there.

I feel like in a way, I’m just finally coming up for air…It has been fun but a lot of work playing guitar for as many artists/groups as I’ve been lately. Grateful for the gigs, truly but perhaps it is a good thing that amount of juggling will be slowing down come April.

Recently I celebrated another solar return. As of this past Tuesday. Officially I’m in my late 30s now, which is a trip to think about in a lot of ways. As a new friend told me though just today during our lesson, a lot of times you’re just getting to your prime then. Be patient and focused. You’ve lived long enough to understand what is worth putting more time and effort in and what isn’t. He gave some other pearls as well, some things I needed to hear in that moment I suppose. That conversation sprouted from a simple thing I said about jumping out of bed too fast and feeling stiff. No matter what age I guess, stretching is always a good idea. My mom would of encouraged core strengthening exercises. I do the pilates 100 often thinking of her.

Anyhow, more things are on the horizon..more music. I’m still trying to figure out how to fund the rest of the record I’ve been working on for the past few years. Though I’m extremely grateful for the help and support I’ve had along the way. The whole process is moving slow. Often help can come in unexpected ways, or when you simply ask for it. Which I’m learning how to do more of. The majority of it though is self-funded so it just takes time. Regardless, I can’t wait to share these songs with y’all.

Recently I was on The Arwen Lewis Podcast to help promote the new songs, as well as this show coming up tonight. It was a nice conversation, I was just waking up but the coffee kicked in about halfway through and made for some interesting pieces, hopefully you’ll find something there you enjoy.

If you’d like to check it out, here is the link:

Now I need to scoot, time to stretch in some new strings and get ready for that release show. Thank you all for tuning in and reading along, as well as for your consistent support! I hope you are enjoying the rainy weather and staying safe out there.

Looking forward catching up very soon!

Much love,
J

New Year’s Eve. Twenty twenty four is coming to a close. By the time you read this, it’ll likely be twenty twenty five.

It has been a very difficult one. A very transformative one. A year full of great personal loss, letting go, lessons and growth.

The washing machine is rattling in the background. Sipping on some peppermint tea while cooking a light meal. I walked for a few miles today. Talked to my dad on the phone while taking in the sunshine. Kept on walking for a few miles more. I had some ear buds in but kept the company of mostly the sounds around me and silence.

Still feeling restless.

Reflecting now.

I hope, dear reader, that your holiday season was well, nourishing and fulfilling. I hope this coming year is the same. I hope that we are all able to pause and find the balance of gratefulness and compassion for ourselves as well as others as we carry on into the complete unknown.

And yes, I did watch that Bob Dylan movie. It was alright. I feel like, if in fact, Bob did approve parts of it, it was almost like the ultimate contrarian move on his end.

Sounds like that did happen. I heard that as the last part of the script was read to him he simply said: “Go with god”, and walked out.

I think I liked the fact that they played all the music live. I’m also a sucker for older films and consequently some things that would be interpreted as corny. They caught a certain something I guess. It wasn’t bad, it wasn’t great. It just kind of was.

One of his songs in particular has been comforting.

‘Death Is Not The End’

“When you’re sad and when you’re lonely, And you haven’t got a friend, just remember that death is not the end, and all you’ve held sacred, falls down and does not mend, just remember that death is not the end, not the end, not the end, just remember that death is not the end.

When you’re standing at the crossroads, that you cannot comprehend, just remember that death is not the end, and all your dreams have vanished and you don’t know what’s up the bend, just remember that death is not the end, not the end, not the end, just remember that death is not the end.

When the storm clouds gather ‘round you and heavy rains descend, just remember that death is not the end, and there’s no one there to comfort you with a helpin’ hand to lend, just remember that death is not the end, not the end, not the end, just remember that death is not the end.

Oh, the tree of life is growing, where the spirit never dies and the bright light of salvation shines in dark and empty skies.“

This past year certainly was a lot of things but dull was not one of them. Living in Santa Barbara has been good enough so far, grateful for the new place I’m living in as well as the friends I’ve made over the years down here, becoming gradually closer.

A good direction for starters.

Sleeping erratically. Been burning the candle at both ends. Up until Christmas really. The other night I was up till 8am for some reason. Haven’t done that in god knows how long. I try to sleep whenever I can. It has been harder lately to drift off. Harder to quiet my mind. A lot to process. That naughty doom scrolling certainly doesn’t help either. I feel like I’m always grabbing for something lately.

A drink, a guitar, my phone.

Whatever I gotta do to self regulate a little. To detach a little. Just enough so I can get through the next day. Remembering to focus on myself and take pauses.

I’m a converted believer in the institution of napping.

What’s next? I don’t know. This past year was so damn much that it’s hard to say where I see this next one going. Keeping my fingers crossed.

A moment to take a breath and relax into wherever I am would be nice. I’ll start there.

I still feel other cities calling. I need to reach out to some friends about booking some solo shows in Nashville, I’d like to see what that place is about. Maybe hang there for a little while.

Another friend brought up LA again. I guess that is always a possibility. Since the city of angels has always been right there I’ve enjoyed being able to dip in without getting stuck there, however the older I get the more alluring it sounds.

My roommate mentioned NYC. That could be fun. I’ve been through there a bit and it is an electric experience every time. Is it the city I wanna be in right now, well that I ain’t too sure of.

It reality though, nothing has to be permanent. No reason to be stuck in procrastination land. Trying to just trust the universe and my intuition.

Finishing up recording is certainly a goal for the first part of this coming year. I’ve got my record and Dante Elephante’s that needs wrapping.

Do you believe in doing resolutions? I think I used to do that more. Not so much these days, I like goals but I tend to have those throughout the year regardless of the earth’s position to the sun. Is that the same thing? Maybe so.

I found this old list, got a bit tattered during the move, forgive the sloppy hand writing. Usually whatever I haven’t done the previous year I just roll into the coming. Some things I just leave on as healthy reminders and as continuous practices.

A few other things I try to keep in mind, that I wrote down around the same time as the above, are:

“Growth comes from being honest with yourself as well as with those around you, and continuing to do so.”

“It’s okay to not know.”

“Let the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in thy sight.”

I read those words back often. I keep them in my journal so I can look over them every time I go to write something. It’s soothing. Grounding. It’s the equivalent of putting on comfy shoes or clothes when you got off of work, it helps you get into that more centered state of mind.

My mom was big on affirmations. I’ve mentioned this before but it seems relevant to mention again. It’s something I’ve inherited.

Really missing those two angels.

My Grandma Elaine passed away very recently. Funny enough, it happened on mom’s birthday. December 13th.

We were all up visiting, my brother and sisters along with my dad at my dad’s place. First time without her being around for the holidays or her birthday.

Usually we’d get together to decorate a tree. My little brother and sister would go pick one up. She loved us all being together and loved the lights. Sometimes we’d go up to this one neighborhood and see all the decorations that folks had come up with for their homes, drive around for a little while.

Soft and tender memories. It’s hard to talk about honestly, so I’ll likely keep this short.

We got the word that Grandma, our mom’s mom, was in the hospital that day. Her health had been slowly getting a little worse, she had just turned 92 recently. A long life. It is odd thinking about talking to her on her birthday four days prior. Grateful for that. I wish I had seen her a little more these past few years.

Something that sticks out to me though is a conversation we had right after my mom’s memorial service back in June. She called me and just wanted to tell me how nice the service was and how mom would have loved it. She said it was perfect. I just started crying, we talked for a little while longer and she told me mom would have been proud.

We talked during the early covid years a lot as well. World events. Politics. Local gossip. Music. That was a nice thing, didn’t really think about it then but I’m thankful for it now.

She left us at almost the same time of night as mom. It was also on a Friday. We were able to see her thankfully before she passed. Soon as she got out of surgery and was in the ICU, our uncle let us know we could come by. It was a very intense surgery and they had to stop part way through to give her body a break. She never really stabilized after that, unfortunately. Got to say goodbye though. Uncanny how much she looked like mom. That might have been one of the hardest things, that and the timing.

Surreal. That’s what one of my uncle’s said as we were talking the next day. The whole thing was just surreal.

We had a funeral service pretty soon afterwords, in honor of her faith, this past December 20th.

It has been something else.

I miss them both. A lot.

There is so much there and it’s all fresh.

I’d like to end this communique though on more of a positive. I do not pretend to know what this next year holds but I’d like to think that given what this past year was, maybe some good things await. Maybe its just enough of a shift in the air for us to work towards something clearer and more honest, with ourselves at least, hopefully though with each other as well.

The few pictures I’m leaving at the end are representative of what I want to be doing even more of in this coming chapter. Some highlights from the various tours and shows over the past 12 months. 141 gigs. Ain’t nothing to sneeze at I guess. I feel the tide changing. Maybe it’s the kind of change we all need in order to get to the place we all wanna be. Wherever that is.

Take care for now and hope you have a wonderful start to the new year.

Thank you for reading, subscribing and following along. Means a lot.

Wishing well, god bless and sending love out there.

~ J

It’s Halloween. October is about over. By the time I actually finish and publish this, it’ll likely be November. Can’t believe that. Most folks I know are out celebrating in some form or another. While in part it sounds nice, maybe mingling a little with people I barely know, and some folks I’m getting to know better, I’ve been burning on all cylinders for quite some time now and a quiet minute sounds like the move.

I opted for a long walk in the new neighborhood. Trying to see where this coastal path ends. Followed it until it spilled out into another neighborhood, must of walked for a few miles at least.

Right now I have this one particular song stuck on repeat. That’s how my ocd tends to pop up these days, I’ll fixate on something, explore the feeling of it and just enjoy whatever it is about that tune that pulled me in. Song of Good Hope by: Glenn Hansard. Heard it randomly online while doom scrolling. The words are really hitting. The first verse especially.

‘If we’re gonna make it, cross this river alive, you need to think like a boat and go with the tide. And I know where you’ve been, has really left you in doubt, of ever finding a harbor, of figuring this out. And you’re gonna need, all the help you can get, So lift up your arms now, and reach for it.’

With the kind of year this past one has been, that resonates.

Picking up where I left off. I’ve been writing this current entry in chunks over a stretch of time. Go figure. That is how my life has been lately. One week of intense focus on something then switching gears to whatever the next thing is.

Often, I find myself daydreaming. Disassociating maybe.

I had this thought the other day about how my brain’s tendency to wander hasn’t changed or let up at all since I was a kid. It makes me feel sometimes like I’m still 12 or 13 years old. I’m learning to not hate that. There is a benefit when your brain is wired a certain way I suppose, which I recognize, however it does make navigating “normal” life sometimes more of a hassle then it needs to be. I still struggle with feeling guilty over the almost impossible task of squeezing my mind into a structure that likely doesn’t suit it.

No complaints really. Just reflecting.

It’s been quite a rollercoaster year hasn’t it? I’m very grateful to anyone who has stuck with me for this amount of time, looking forward to continuing to build and evolve this newsletter. I have some ideas for the future, we’ll see how that comes together. At the bottom I’ve included a an old demo of a song I found recently. Hope you enjoy and thank you to everyone and anyone who find themselves here. Means a lot.

Now for a coffee induced ramble, relating to well...coffee.

After a couple weeks of looking through boxes, reusable bags stuffed with random ingredients, a cacophony of recently released items from storage and the general frustration of trying to find one specific thing after moving, I finally decided to order some more Aeropress filters.

Things are a little all over the place.

My brother’s partner turned me onto another option for making coffee. French press is good. Pour over is great. Aeropress might be the best.

Today is the first day I’ve been able to execute this little ritual I have with coffee. It’s one more thing that helps this new place feel like home and helps me feel a little more steady.

Update: The french press broke. I’m living in Santa Barbara now. Storage unit is empty.

While sipping on this morning cup, in the not so back of my mind, I know that I’m procrastinating. I have a black belt in that. A masters degree. A doctorate. Slipping into random tangential thought and distracting myself with one thing when I should be focusing on another.

Maybe I’m just waking up. Yes, that’s likely it. It couldn’t be anything else. I’m trying to remember the non stimulant version of a medication that helps with ADHD, my friend mentioned it over the summer and I think it’s likely about time I give something like that a shot.

I must confess my guilt in not writing on here for a minute - I’ve missed the regular typing of words. The slow burn. More my speed. Simple and more wholesome somehow than a lot of the other platforms we mostly find ourselves performing on at one time or another. Helps you feel a little more present.

Flash forward.

Things have calmed down a little, I feel like I can get back into more of a rhythm again. I’ll say it one more time; I’m happy and truly grateful to whomever has continued to subscribe and follow along. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Touring twice back to back over the course of three to four months while also moving was, to use one word, exhilarating, but not a decision I would recommend lightly. It is what I needed to do for myself though, at that moment in time. I’m still playing catch up in a lot of ways. Still sorting through a lot. Throwing all your stuff in storage the day you leave for tour, after a snap decision that’s been brewing for a while, well - it’s a choice. Being on the road with Hot Freaks & Dante Elephante, then jumping right onto the Antonio Barret & Gardens and Villa run was really something. A lot of positive experiences and dynamic experiences. Grateful for the work and opportunity. As many ups and downs as tour life can have, there is a freedom that comes from having really no other choice other then to surrender to the moment, to where you are at that time, it almost feels like the only way to get by. To move forward day to day. I was able to focus on other areas in my life that I haven’t addressed for some time. Did a lot of internal work. Silver linings. Glass half full type beat.

As the dust clears, I’m very grateful for the area in Santa Barbara I’ve ended up. It’s a good change to where I’ve felt glued. Maybe Nashville or LA next. I’ve finally entered the phase in my life where I’m saying yes more to a variety of opportunities or situations that present themselves, just pulling on different threads and seeing where they lead. Trying to cultivate more growth.

Full disclosure though, keeping this busy has always been my way of processing tough situations, the changes and things life can throw your way - the most recent heavy thing being the passing of my mom, it’s been almost seven months now.

I think about her every day. I wish I could share with her the things I’ve been experiencing. Life in general. She’d love this spot and this area. She’d love the close proximity to the ocean and mountains. Reaching out for her thoughts or opinions is a hard instinct to fight. I miss her, greatly.

The sun is rising now. Listening to the sound of birds outside the window as I’m typing. A lot of hummingbirds hang out there. Another reminder of mom. It’s a Tuesday now. Daylight savings just happened, why that still is a thing is beyond me.

Another song I’ve been starting to enjoy a lot lately is one that my student is learning, always showing me the neatest little country gems. This one I hadn’t heard in a minute and upon hearing it now with fresh ears and a different perspective, it’s also going on repeat. The song is ‘Lookin’ For Love’ by: Johnny Lee, from the 1980’s motion picture Urban Cowboy. There are some other good ones on that soundtrack. Funny enough, I still haven’t seen the movie.

There is a bee now buzzing around inside, door was left open and I gotta go deal with that. Be right back…

I’m thinking of doing a little spring cleaning early with this newsletter, inspired by a friend who I found out recently is also on this platform - Jonie Online - worth checking out her Substack if you haven’t yet. Anyhow, there are a few things I’d like to tackle but first on that to do list is a name change. The name I’ve had for this publication since inception has been ‘Coffee & Chords with Cole”. I’m thinking of shortening it or coming up with something else entirely.

My question to you is; Do you think the name in its current state is too long? My feeling is yes, but I’d love your thoughts on it. The other options I’m juggling are:

1. Coffee with Cole

2. Coffee & Chords

3. Jacob’s Ladder

Let me know what you think in the comments below, would love and appreciate hearing from you! Open to suggestion. Whatever that may be. Even if a majority thought would be to keep the original name and chill out. Thank you kindly in advance.

Prior to all the craziness and everything that happened over these past few months, I finished a couple of recordings with my friend Grey Bear. One of them I’ve mentioned on here before. The other I just released this past week. The name of the track being ‘Waiting On Tomorrow’. Suffice to say it feels good to get something new out there in the world.

My friend Cecilia James did the artwork. I love how it turned out. Her work is always a favorite, one might say; chef’s kiss. You can find the song, if you haven’t heard it yet, pretty much streaming anywhere and everywhere. The other track ‘The Contender’ I did a soft release of back in June but I’ll be doing a proper release of that soon. Thinking the end of the month if I can get the funds together. It would be fun to do a music video as well, I suppose we’ll see.

This particular tune comes from a batch of songs I started working on during the summer of 2020. I kind of forgot about those songs and left them by the way side in favor of recording a newer batch of songs in 2023. That record is still in the works but for some reason around the time of my mom’s health really declining, I became inspired to revisit these older ones. For a variety of reasons, that cosmically I’m not totally sure of, it just intuitively feels right. I guess it’s all relative. Just got off the phone, as it happens, with my friend and recording partner Bear. I think we are gonna try moving forward to finally finish this original record. In truth I’d like to finish both albums as soon as possible but given limited resources, I have to go with my gut on this one.

The drums, bass and acoustic guitars are all done. So that leaves guitars, vocals and whatever additional instrumentation sounds fitting track by track. It’s all a head game at the end of the day but funny enough, and likely due to their age, I feel a little looser and less pressure on these tracks, like I can have a little more fun and stretch out. Hopefully that translates in a positive way.

In addition to getting motivated to finish some of my tracks, the Dante Elephante crew has also been working on a new record. The songs are all there, we’ve got parts more or less worked out - of course with some room for what can happen in the studio, just to need to head down to LA to start building on the recently recording drum tracks. Looking forward to that.

Dante also just put out a new live record. We recorded this over the course of a weekend in April 2023, live at Soho Music Club in Santa Barbara. Streaming everywhere. There is currently a pre-order going for the vinyl, which you can find here if interested - https://www.diggersfactory.com/vinyl/321540/dante-elephante-back-in-santa-barbara-live

Well now, I think this little catch up is winding down. Thank you dear reader for sticking with me this long. I look forward to continuing to share and hope that we can stay connected along the way.

It is also not lost on me that as I’m likely finishing these thoughts and words, this will come out on Election Day. As my friend said last night, Godspeed to us all.

Most folks who know me outside of this platform know I enjoy occasionally talking politics, conspiracy theories, societal matters and what not, however as a general rule, I tend to believe that most of the time participating in this online isn’t in the world’s best interest. For myself at least. On this level. Things can get distorted easily and taken out of context. We forgot about what it means to have a good faith debate or conversation. Things become emotional or personal at light speed and there is a level of civility that can be lost when staring at a screen. I believe we benefit more from diversity of thought in person, talking with other people in the room. Establishing things we have in common before moving into potentially uncomfortable territory, because at least then you’ll hopefully remember that in truth, and despite what the headlines say, we do actually have quite a bit more in common with one another then you’d otherwise believe. It might seem counterintuitive, who knows.

Something I truly value from touring over the years as a musician, is seeing this sort of thing first hand. I’ve learned from talking and meeting with a lot of different people, from all backgrounds and walks of life, about the capacity to which an individual can hold a surprising amount of varying opinions, values and beliefs that even just as recently as a few short years ago, we would of deemed improbable. The midterms in 2022 are a strong example of this. There is a real tangible dynamic at play that I find fascinating, and speaks to a greater realignment that seems to have been subtly happening for quite some time. Suffice to say, even though division seems to be encouraged by the powers that be, it’s hard to put anyone in a box.

For better or worse, people never seem to surprise me. Which is one reason why, regardless of who wins, and maybe naively, I’ll remain a little more optimistic. My own hope is that we can continue to find ways to talk with each other, especially with the folks you disagree with and find some kind of common ground. Once you get past the partisanship and divisive rhetoric, you might find it surprising how many people actually agree with you on more things than not. It’s a sliding scale of course, but to me that’s a start. Hope you’re able to vote your conscience wherever you are.

On that note, I’ll leave you with a quote from the late great Quincy Jones:

“You make your mistakes to learn how to get to the good stuff. Imagine what a harmonious world it could be if every single person, both young and old shared a little of what they are good at doing.”

Thank you again and I’ll see you on the other side. More coming soon. Best wishes with all and sending love out there.

Xoxo,

J

(P.S. Here is the promised track, from those 2020 sessions, False Pretenses.)

You’re always tired, sometimes just a little less tired. Writing at 12:45am post show in Houston, Texas. A lot of driving the past two days. We had to split it up. Eight hours yesterday and six today. Florida was a good time, nice playing in Orlando and Tampa. First time in Miami. Great coffee and food. We stayed at an Airbnb in Mississippi around the halfway point to our destination.

We played a sold out set at the White Oak Music Hall with Hot Freaks. Haven’t played here since 2019 when we were on tour with Summer Salt. A lot of energy and a good crowd. It felt nice being back in that part of Texas.

We’re on month two now of touring with the afore mentioned freaks of the heated variety. They’ve been a great bunch of people to travel around with, some of the most relaxed and down to earth folks we’ve encountered in this business so far. I’m gonna say this word quite a bit today, but - grateful.

Watching a little bit of this show called Catfish on MTV, trying to persuade myself to fall asleep.

Thinking about how funny, messy, frustrating and fascinating humanity is. Folks in general. This television program is a trip. I might be in the wrong field. Feeling disconnected a bit. Thinking about going back to school. Today’s google search was “how old is too old to go to college?” - Growing pains, more then your muscles aching?

I was homeschooled and tested early on to go to community college. I wanted to be involved with art in some way, I loved comic books and illustrations. Used to sketch things all the time, doodle randomly on anything, come up with cartoon characters. Sci-fi starships, different galaxies and worlds. Big imagination brain. When I was enrolled at Allan Hancock College and had been working on my final for an art class I was taking that semester and heard a cassette tape of Jimi Hendrix “Live at the BBC” - it floored me in a way that really compounded my already growing desire for and interest in the guitar. My relationship with that instrument and music changed quite a bit after.

(Update, just played San Antonio. It is now 2;17pm. Friday. It’s August? Lord, this year has been something else. I probably say this often but I can’t believe we are already eight months into 2024. We are driving to Dallas now for another gig before we head back to Austin.)

On the road a few days back my cousin Joel had a podcast on called Broken Record. This episode featured an interview with Michael McDonald discussing life, music and his recent book, What A Fool Believes. He must be in his 70s by now and what he was talking about certainly resonated. No matter what he has done, or given the breadth of his career, he still feels like he is looking for what comes next. Still figuring it out and trying things to see what sticks. Still searching. That, I guess, is one of the unspoken secrets in life - there is a myth that someday you figure everything out, and while that may be true for some, it seems like most of us are just on a continuous cycle of figuring shit out as it comes and perpetually learning, hopefully growing. I think hard work and focus are certainly part of getting somewhere but sometimes it seems like just a little luck, direction, letting go, surrendering, divine intervention or a combination of all of the above are actually what guide you to where you need to be, in the end.

(Update number two, just played Dallas at Club Dada. Fun show, good turn out. Good sound. Now back in Austin for our final show in Texas before heading north to Oklahoma City. It is 5:51pm, Saturday August 3rd.)

Sitting in a booth across from the bar at the venue we’re playing tonight in downtown Austin, Texas. Empire Control Room & Garage. It ain’t far from Stubb’s, a cool spot to catch music. Quite a few places though here around Congress and 6th are good for that. Drove down from Dallas earlier this afternoon. Parking was tuff. The heat has been oppressive, as Joel said. He ain’t wrong. We were also warned about a serial killer being on the loose around the area we are in, The Lady Bird Killer. Creates a little extra drama I suppose. Have to keep an eye on drinks, employ the buddy system and what not. Stuff you tend to do most of the time anyways when traveling like we are, however the added awareness is never a bad thing. Likely all will be well, fingers crossed, god willing and the creek don’t rise. Aside from that, should be a decent show.

(Update number three, Texas was a hoot and a half, none of us died, ended up staying with an old friend and hanging out in Austin a little longer, ran into some weather, drove hard to OKC for a show at the Resonant Head, followed by more heavy driving for a show at Blueberry Hill in St. Louis, MO.)

We are now in Wisconsin, outside of Milwaukee. Staying with the headliner bands family while we have a day off. Very grateful to be by a body of water, feels very healing here. Needed. It’s been good company, very grateful for this crew and the people on this tour.

The last two gigs before landing at this location were good. Great actually - especially for a Monday and Tuesday night. Both Oklahoma City and St. Louis were charming, each in their own right.

I was with the gang down by the lake for a bit, but decided to get a start on catching up with laundry, so figured in the meantime, can’t beat sitting on a patio overlooking this view while trying to catch up on some writing.

Some jazz music is floating up from the crew down a ways, by the lake. Didn’t swim today, maybe tomorrow. Got knee deep, the water feels great. This is a beautiful place. I said it already but I’m super thankful we had the opportunity to rest here. To get a little time to catch up.

Folks are coming back up now, the suns going down. Everyone is a few drinks deep, the conversation is easy and earnest. Tim (aka Pleasure Horse) busts out his acoustic, crooning some old country tunes and playing some nice finger style guitar. It’s been nice talking guitar/music with him and hearing his background. This is his first tour with Hot Freaks, I haven’t seen them live before this but he certainly seems to be adding a valuable piece.

Between a good dinner, an impromptu campfire, sharing in each other’s company while making s’mores, a hot tub visit and a place to sleep - it was a damn good day off.

Any of y’all have recurring dreams? I had one the other night, some of the details are a little vague. Somebody said once that dreams are windows into your other lives. What I remember is water and an island. Having to dive under to try and find something, something I don’t remember. I was given instruction not to head to a very deep and dark part of the ocean, under the volcanic mountain side of this isolated piece of land. I was told, if I wasn’t ready to see what was out there, to not go. I started to swim that way but instinctively felt a chill and decided to stay on task with the quest I thought I had been given. I remember the feeling of the place more than what I was doing though. Swimming through an underwater tunnel to a soft golden light. The scuba gear I was wearing was antique, it looked like something you’d wear if you were searching for Atlantis in the 1940’s. I think the significance of water is real, the whole dream felt familiar, I knew immediately I had waded through these currents before, picking up either where I left off last time or stuck on a loop until I understood how to unlock the next door. Woke up not long after.

Back to living outta of the van and various hotel rooms. Sipping on coffee, listening to strangers chatting and the sound of local news on in the background. Still in Milwaukee. We’ve got a day off again. Heading down to Chicago in a little while. Need to fix Joel’s bass. I gotta grab a few little things as well, strings and essentials. Grateful that I don’t have that much money, Chicago Music Exchange is always tempting.

Hope everyone who is reading this is doing well, thank you again as always for following along. I’ve got some pre-recorded lessons that I’ll be uploading soon for those interested. That’ll be under the paid subscriptions catalogue covering various topics, mostly geared towards some lead playing and fretboard mapping ideas. Things I’m always trying to work on as well. You never stop learning if you’re open to it. While I know what I can do on the guitar, I’m acutely aware of my limitations, always looking to improve on that. For me that’s actually part of the fun, part of where my drive comes from, there is so much room to continue to grow no matter where you think you are, that is all part of the craft.

The next dates and cities we have coming up on tour are:

8/12 Iowa City, IA

8/13 Omaha, NE

8/15 Denver, CO

8/16 Salt Lake City, UT

8/18 Boise, ID

8/19 Seattle, WA

8/20 Portland, OR

8/22 Sacramento, CA

8/23 San Francisco, CA

8/24 Santa Ana, CA

8/25 Los Angeles, CA

8/27 San Diego, CA

8/28 Phoenix, AZ

After that I’ve got a quick week off to move things from storage into my new place, if all things go well, then I’ll be hitting the road again for another short tour with a band that just hired me for some guitar on their west coast run. Excited for the opportunity and additional work, more on that soon. Grateful and continuing to try to cast the net as wide as can be, as a friend said.

Wishing y’all well, hope things are going good as can be. Thank you for reading along if you’ve read this far and I’ll be checking in sooner then later.

All the best,

Jacob

We haven’t been able to escape the rain. First in North Carolina, beautiful thunderstorms. Beautiful area around Chapel Hill. Trying to load out from the gig proved impossible. Just walking from the van to the venue left me freshly showered. At least it’s a tropical rain. With this type of weather I’m expecting to hear the theme from Jurassic Park any moment. Now we’ve followed that system or it’s followed us, but here we are with the rain in Georgia.

The prompt today, start writing. As simple as that is, it’s easier said then done. I finished filling up my journal. So while the way I write on here has been similar to how I’d vent things on the pages of a book, the next few posts will likely have even more of a stream of consciousness feel.

Tori Amos is playing in the hotel lobby. Cornflake Girl. Reminds me of the drive from Santa Barbara to Lompoc. The 101 to the Pacific Coast Highway. The way she plays the piano is focused and aggressive, pounding the keys like you’re playing a metal riff. I love it. The words drip with memory over the speakers.

Also, and in fitting with the weather, highly recommend the song Rainy Night in Georgia by: Brook Benton.

I appreciate everyone who reached out, commented, messaged and had kind words regarding my last post on here. Love you all. That truly means a lot. Grief is a funny thing. Since my mom’s memorial last month, I only feel like I can start getting back to processing this loss in my own way. I’m grateful for therapy and the tools I’ve learned there. Being a little more adept at letting myself lean into whatever feelings come bubbling up and not running from them or trying to control them or push them down. I had a dream with her in it the other night. That’s the first time that’s happened since she’s passed. I wish I could remember exactly what she said but her presence was full of light, radiating positive energy and beaming with a spiritual wisdom. I can still feel her in this moment. There is something calming about that.

Sipping on coffee now. Gigging tonight at the Masquerade in downtown Atlanta. Tour so far, about two and a half weeks in, has been smooth enough. When we were in Washington DC I had some gear issues. I had some cables that grew legs and walked out on me after NYC. That was issue number one. Then while starting to decompress and change in the green room the sound person came up, caught me with my pants down and told me my amp was making all kinds of strange noises. Once I finished putting on my 501’s I went back down to the stage and investigated. Sure enough, something strange was afoot. Did some quick troubleshooting and found that my Strymon Flint was introducing some serious noise and sonic artifacts into the signal chain. Definitely a bummer given the cost of those damn pedals. Grateful it wasn’t either of my amp’s. Also grateful I have a friend who was able to help me out while on the road. Shout out to Jack. I did a little repair work on the cables, bypassed the pedal and the shows since have been smooth. Fingers crossed.

It’s been a tight tour budget wise but making it work. Moving out before was a little intense but definitely the move. The folks subscribing on here help as well. Every bit always does, very thankful for y’all.

Ten shows down, Twenty four to go. After Georgia - we’ve got Florida, Texas, Oklahoma, Missouri, Wisconsin, Iowa, Nebraska, Colorado, Utah, Idaho, Washington, Oregon, California and then finally Arizona.

If anyone has any good coffee, music or thrift shop recommendation’s for any of the upcoming dates and states, please leave in the comments below.

Now time to shower and get ready for the rest of the day.

Wishing you all well wherever you are, will talk soon. Enjoy that summer feeling.

Lots of love,

~ J

I am outside of a Honky Tonk bar inside a casino in Atlantic City, NJ. Writing, catching up, thinking about my mom and her recent memorial. Thinking about family. Tearing up around strangers. I haven’t bought a pack of cigs yet, so that’s something. A day off. Needed. Drinking coffee that’s too expensive. Is it worth it? Well it’s all that’s around. Taking a chance to process. Thankful for that time now, though it ain’t always been the easiest thing.

One thing I’ve learned from this grieving process so far is; you never know when you’re gonna get hit with that wave of grief, so just let it come and try to embrace it as best you can. On the way into the city there was a sign on the expressway that said “Let the waves crash”. I suppose it’s a lot like that.

Decided to move rather last minute prior to hitting the road.

Everything is in storage now. What didn’t fit is either in my Chevy Astro or rotating back into thrift store circulation.

For a long time now I’ve been wanting and needing to shake things up, given all that’s happened this past year it seemed like as good a time as any.

Before my mom passed away we talked about that very thing. I asked her about what city sounded nice to her out of Santa Barbara, Ventura, LA or Nashville. She said anywhere but Ventura, for some reason, still makes me laugh thinking about it. Personally I like that city. Asking for her opinion on things though, her take, that’s something that I certainly miss most right now. I’m used to calling her or texting when traveling. Sharing the locations of where I’m going and where I’ve been. She loved to travel. She loved exploring places. She loved hearing stories. I’ve said this before, so forgive me for being repetitive, part of the reason I started this Substack was for her to live vicariously. Sometimes that’s why it’s felt a little tough to get back into writing more regularly on here.

Moving into this new place when I get back. It will be a welcome and needed change of scene. Kind of a shotgun decision but the way I figure, why not. It’s a good little opportunity.

At a gig before I left, someone who knew my mom from a long time ago came up to me and said I have a message from her for you. It felt a little like a from the beyond grave type thing. I wonder how normal that is? I’m sure there is good meaning or intention there, but it did take me aback temporarily. It’s funny how some people communicate their condolences. Death can make folks very uncomfortable and act in all kinds of strange ways. That said, I’m very grateful for the abundance of support and love that has been there. To everyone who has reached out, love you all.

Carrying my mom’s memory with me wherever I go.

Heading to New York City tomorrow.

Been on tour since July 8th. Living out of a duffle bag. As chaotic as this year has been, this part of life has oddly felt more routine. The music thing. Traveling from gig to gig. There is a certain level of comfort in the consistency of inconsistency.

First day of tour we had some van trouble, we were trying to make it from Southern California to Utah but ended up getting stuck in Nevada - the shifting cable had other plans. While pulling in to the gas station to fill up we realized we couldn’t get the van into park. It took a little bit, but after a quick google search and getting under the vehicle, I was able to finagle the cable back onto the transmission. The use of bandaids and duck tape provided a very temporary fix till we could get the car fixed properly. Simple thing, as it turns out, it‘s just the shop back in Santa Barbara did a piss poor job solving the initial issue.

116 degree weather that day, hell of a time to get stuck. Thankfully there was a spot across from the mechanics that had very functional AC and that we were able to make up the time by just driving a little harder, for a little while longer. Ended up making it to Chicago on time.

This current line-up of Dante Elephante is Ruben, Shrub, my cousin Joel on bass and myself. Joel has played off and on with Dante over the years, nice to be on tour with him again. Probably the longest run we’ve done together. We’ve got roughly six weeks left. It’s a certainly a haul.

Here is the full schedule.

Tour overall has been good. Hot Freaks are very down to earth folks, one of the easier bands we’ve had the pleasure of sharing a summer package with.

Good venues and turn outs so far. Still pretty early on in it but we’ve been seeing low ticket warnings for quite a few of these shows. That’s a nice thing to roll up to. No real gear issues, not like last time. Taking both my Princeton and Pro Reverb for amps, my old Strat and a bevy of pedals to help get the tones needed for this set. We have some newer songs we are road testing. That always feels good.

Overall now, feeling grateful for all the help along the way. From moving all my stuff temporarily into storage to friends and family on the road letting us crash with them or just meeting good people along the way.

I appreciate you dear reader for hanging out here in this space and continuing to follow along. Life is a trip, I’m very grateful to anyone and everyone that has found interest in this little music thing we’re out here trying to do. Your support means the world.

I’ll leave you with a quote that I saw in Ohio last week.

“I am you, searching to be free, the story of life is quicker then the wink of an eye, the story of love is hello and goodbye, until we meet again.” - Jimi Hendrix

Will check in soon, till then - take care and stay outta trouble, or find good trouble, whatever floats your proverbial boat.

~ J

Lately, and by lately I mean the past couple months, I’ve been floating in and out of hard disassociation, depression and giving myself goals and things to focus on outside of helping to plan my family’s memorial service for our mom.

It’s been a challenge. Then again I guess that’s part of what grief and the journey that goes along with it is. A lot of things feel bland at the moment, so having something to work towards feels healthy. Grateful for therapy, grateful for friends and folks who check in randomly, grateful for having a space to myself to decompress and organize my thoughts. The little things, like coffee, are what get me up in the morning. It’s like feeling everything and nothing at the same time. Other times its a different experience. My therapist says what you’re doing is titration. That’s the word of the day. Word of the month.

I finished recording two new songs, one I shared here on Substack with y’all back when I first got this thing going last fall. The other is an older number I recently decided to rewrite and finish. One song is available now on bandcamp, along with an instrumental version. The other will be released as a “B-side” once I do a wider digital release. As of now I’m shooting for July 5th, just waiting on getting the masters back for the 2nd track and then I’ll send off everything for distribution.

I recorded and produced both of these songs with Grey Bear Erickson, always good to collaborate with him. My friend Cecilia James did the artwork, and my other friend Jasmine Gonzalez took the photo’s used for the artwork, like the one above. I’ve developed a fondness for the sport of boxing over the years and wanted to draw inspiration from old poster art. It is a brutal sport, all around, but for some reason I find it interesting and inspirational. Maybe it’s just me watching too many movies.

Played a full band show at Soho Music Club in Santa Barbara this past weekend. Appreciate everyone who came out. First time playing with my own band all year. It was a nice way to release some pent up energy. Opened for and played with Dante Elephante. It was fun being on both sides of the coin that night. Jess Bush on keys, my brother Samuel Cole on drums, Grey Bear on guitar and Wesley Hill (The Only Ocean) on bass. It’s a nice group.

Now my mom’s celebration of life is just two weeks away. That’ll be the main focus for the immediate future. Hard to believe. Lots of little details to take care of. Thankfully we’ve been doing some heavier lifting over the course of the past few months, so it ain’t hitting all at once.

Anyhow dear reader, I hope you are doing well. Is life going smoothly for you? Are you finding balance and joy somewhere? I truly hope so. I know there is a lot happening out there for everyone.

As always I appreciate anyone who is here, supporting, engaging, following along.

One of the reasons why I think a lot of artists or musicians get so far into communicating through an artistic medium is due to our inability to connect by conventional means. At least for myself, that’s always been a struggle and rings true. What drives, a lot of the time but not all, creative expression for me is a strong desire to connect. So thank you for tuning in. I’m very grateful to each and every one of you.

I’m gonna keep this post overall on the shorter end, but I’ll check back sooner then later. Trying to get back into the swing of things. I hope you enjoy the music linked above. If interested I have some dates coming up before summer tour with Dante.

6/15 at Arrowsmith’s Wine Bar, Solvang CA (solo)

6/20 at the Lompoc Flower Festival, Lompoc CA (full band)

6/28 at Savory and Sweet, Lompoc CA (duo)

6/29 at 805 Charcuterie, Santa Maria CA (solo)

Wishing well and talk to you soon,

J

It’s 2:12am. Sipping on a Modelo, I don’t know exactly why. I don’t really drink beer. One turned up in my fridge though, can’t say how - but like a cheap magic trick on a vacant night in Vegas, it just appeared. Sipping on it aimlessly. Crisp and cold for a time but I took too long drinking it. Now it’s transformed into a lukewarm and lifeless substance. A half full (or empty) can of soft relief.

Have you heard of that tv show Monk? The one with Tony Shalhoub as the obsessive compulsive detective. I’ve been watching that quite a bit lately. Mom loved that show. She always recommended it. I started watching earlier this year. It was something else we could connect on when talking about whatever else we happened to be talking about at that particular moment. It was a nice break from life. The heaviness of things. It was something fun to laugh about. She loved Tony. He was born the same year as mom, 1953. She’d probably get a kick out of that if she didn’t already know. She loved numbers, patterns and puzzles. Crosswords and sudoku we’re favorites.

Each episode is playing on automatic. I’m half watching now.

The impulse to text her about what season I’m on is as strong as ever. The instinct to call her when I’m on my way to a gig and have a drive ahead of me hasn’t faded. If I need to ask for an opinion on something. If I’m on tour and in a city I think she’d get a kick out of. If I’m out walking. To simply check in and see how she’s doing. To ask for advice. To laugh about something or maybe just to hear her voice. Instead - I scroll through old text messages we shared. Old pictures. Old memories. I find one message in particular that I saved from years ago. I read the words back over and over. They provide a little bit of calm. She was sharing an affirmation from one of her favorite books along with some wisdom. She was big on affirmations.

I’m on season seven now.

My sister Anna pointed out the blessing in disguise of modern technology, being able to look back on her posts. To hear her talking. To see her moving. Even during the hardest parts of living with her diagnosis, movement was a passion. There was a certain kind of peace and strength she drew from it. It helped keep her going.

Sometimes I like to think of her whole life was one unending, complicated and beautiful dance. Constantly moving in and out of different eras, different situations, good and bad times, beautiful moments and experiences shared by those who loved her and by those whose live’s she touched.

It’s been one month now since we had our last conversation. It was a Wednesday night. She was really tired but had a light in her eyes. A light I hadn’t seen in a little while. I know she had a rough morning, couldn’t sleep due to the pain but it sounded (and seemed) like the nurses and team had finally gotten that under control a little. By this point she’d been in the CCU for a few days. She talked about how tired she was, and how she just needed a break. Needed to recharge. Looking back there is always so much more you want to say in those moments. It was funny too, she insisted I don’t come to visit the next day, I was starting a new job in Santa Barbara and had a gig that night at Soho. She didn’t want me to miss those things or put my life on hold. She never wanted anyone really to fuss all that much. Never wanted to be a burden. Truly, she never was. I told her that but then just smiled, tears forming. It was a classic request on her part. Very representative of her personality. I did my best to honor her wishes, I’m still doing that, just doing my best.

We talked for a little while longer. I don’t remember exactly what I said but I was just trying to make her smile or laugh. To take her mind off of the reality of where things were. Rambling like a champ, I was talking a lot but not really saying anything. She listened and chimed in when she had the energy. Her voice was stronger then it had been, it was nice to hear her with a little bit of her old spark back. I had brought her flowers but they wouldn’t let me bring them into her room. Stricter rules this time around. The nurses she had were kind and very attentive though, grateful for that.

It was now after 8pm. I know she needed rest but I lingered for a little while longer, made sure she didn’t need anything else. We said I love you. I leaned over her bed then hugged and kissed her goodnight.

She passed away on Friday March 22nd. Two days after our last conversation. In the evening. My siblings, my father, my brother’s partner, we all got to be with her during those last few moments. Those last few hours. We had the chance to say goodbye. I know we are lucky in that way. I’m grateful for that. We were able to say I love you many times over. To hold her hand. To talk a little even though she couldn’t respond. I believe she knew we were all there. Sang a little bit because the nurses said that hearing is one of the last things to go. Whispered words. It was all hard. It still is. I’m still processing how that day and night went. Really, how that last week went and subsequently those last few months. How much she fought and for long she fought for. How she has finally found some relief. Some peace. She’s not in pain anymore and after five and half years of fighting cancer - every extra minute we had with her was a blessing. She can now rest easy. It was raining when we left the hospital.

They say the grief never goes away. You just grow around it. Grow with it. You keep on expanding as life continues. The feelings keep coming in waves. Big ones, small ones. I’m just trying to navigate them as best I can. Surrender to them. I guess that’s all anyone can do.

Haven’t written anything in a while. I’m still trying to find what normal feels like again. Every day getting out of bed is harder then it used to be, but I know she’d want us to keep moving forward in some way - So I do. That’s what makes me put one foot in front of the other. Right now I’m sharing this because it feels like the right thing. Tomorrow that might change. I think that’s okay.

Part of not saying more about it til now is that it feels like it just makes it that much more real. That much more concrete. It’s all still really fresh. It hurts. I know there are no rules to this kind of thing. You move at your own pace. You try to give yourself a little grace. I’ve been taking my time.

Trying to work again. The rent still has to be paid. The world keeps on turning. It’s a funny thing to think about, while dealing with this loss and pain - things just sort of go on, and then keep going.

I miss her every day.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart to everyone who has reached out and lent kind words. To everyone who’s been there. I can’t share my gratitude enough.

Wishing well to you all. If you love someone, tell them. Give them a hug. Keep spreading that feeling, that is something she was always trying to do.

Leaving you with some words from a book she loved called The Prophet by: Khalil Gibran.

“Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing. And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb. And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance.”

Talk to y’all soon. Lots of love.

~ J

Howdy all,

I hope this finds you well. I wanted to hop on to give y’all a quick update and just check in more then anything. The grind has been getting to me, as has life in general. A lot has happened in a little bit of time. Like I said in my last post, this year is certainly off to a hell of a start.

I can’t wait to get to recording but I’m trying to figure out some things financially first. My Chevy Astro sidekick is still in need of some love before I make any more moves regarding hitting the studio. Those albums will just have to wait a little bit longer, unfortunately. Funny enough, I’m already working on a new batch of songs. Excited about writing again.

There is one song I finished mixing last year with Grey Bear. As of now I was thinking of releasing on birthday in March. I may just do that for fun. Getting something out there would be cathartic.

I started doing therapy again a few weeks ago. That routine feels good. I’m hoping to finally make a move down south this year, aiming for summer. Writing it out here, and saying it out loud, helps to hold me accountable. I’m working a lot these days in Santa Barbara, as of now that makes the most sense.

One of my biggest fears is becoming George Bailey from It’s A Wonderful Life. My ex-wife told me that a long time ago and its stuck in the back of my mind since.

The theme of not living up to my own expectations or the expectations of others seems to be a constant so far in twenty twenty four. Maybe that’ll change.

How about you? How are you doing? Has the year been kind? Are you where you want to be? Are you going where you want to go? I wish the best to you, wherever you are.

I’m playing tomorrow night in San Luis Obispo with a band and friend I’ve never had the opportunity to play with. The Shawn Clark Family Band. We’re making noise at a spot I haven’t played since before Covid. Kreuzberg’s. Good coffee and a nice spot in the evening to stop off for a night cap. I just got hired a couple days ago so that means changing gears from the rock and roll I’ve been jamming lately and both figuratively and literally wearing a different kind of hat. Preferably a Stetson.

If you’re local to the central coast and around, I’d love to see you. I believe we start at 9pm, though music starts at 8pm.

I’ve also been playing recently with another artist based in Santa Barbara named Alexandra Riorden. That’s been another fun project to play guitar in. We have some dates coming up come March.

Expanding and exploring new folks to play with is something I haven’t done in a minute. Something I’ve been wanting to do again. It feels good and I forgot how much I enjoy getting inside the idea of, and feeling of, something different then what I’m used to playing guitar on. Always a good way to keep learning and growing. Throwing yourself into something you don’t know too well. It can keep you sharp. Though I’m trying to be cognizant of stretching myself too thin.

Not too many solo gigs at the moment. I want to get back into doing more under my own name but I’m trying to stick with less of those until I finish recording. Almost a self imposed exile of sorts for additional motivation.

Anyhow, time to get back to teaching. Talk soon and take care till next time.

~ J

Hello all,

I hope this year is off to a good start. Wishing y’all the best so far.

It’s been a minute since logging on last.

Thank you if you’re still here. Still around. I’m grateful for your support and patronage. The interest and care means a lot, more then I can really put forward in words.

Currently, thinking of the time. Age. Loss. Growth. Honestly I’m very much still decompressing from the past couple of months being on the road, as well as the holidays and the other things life can throw your way. The past week I feel like I’ve actually had a minute to start feeling into this new year and really meditate on where I’d like to go next. Where life might be heading. Opening myself up to different opportunities and as always, trying to be present.

The question of the hour; where does that pesky old time go? It seems to slip through your fingers quicker then Doc Holiday in Tombstone Arizona.

Anyhow, another trip around the sun. Like everyone else, transitioning into 2024.

To pause briefly and reflect, the rest of tour went well. The new songs have been sounding good and at this point we’re just needing to hit the studio to start work on the next record. After the Midwest, south, east coast and a little bit of Canada we came home to California’s central coast for everyone’s individual version of thanksgiving. We had a few days off then Dante Elephante finished out the west coast portion of tour with Rudy De Anda. Seattle Washington being our last stop. Booked it back down to Santa Barbara county and made it home in time to help decorate the Christmas tree.

Grateful for the experience, travel, work and music.

Sometimes I pause to think about how I don’t really have much to show for how old I am. It’s all relative. Age and the way you view things can be funny like that. Perspective is everything. The whole “From another point of view” thing is something I subscribe to. That said, I can also say I’ve been lucky enough to do what I love for a decent amount of time, seeing places and doing things I otherwise wouldn’t have. Experience’s that are unique to and shared by others who pursue an intrinsically alternative lifestyle. Being an artist or musician for a living ain’t always easy but it is rewarding in its own way. Higher highs and lower lows.

Maybe what I mean by not having a lot to show is more of a material thing? Like a lack of security or something.

In a way I feel like I should be doing more then I’m currently doing. Yet, I am already doing a fair amount when I stop to take account. The feeling is either one of playing catch up, being the gifted procrastinator I am, or a rush of striving for something more. Goals are healthy. As well as continued growth. However that hard hand of never doing enough is an interesting one. One I’ve wrestled with my whole life. A little crazy making sometimes. It can set my OCD wired mind into a loop. These invisible benchmarks you make for yourself…Entrenched in the brain like a bad memory I have trouble shaking.

As a musician and an artist type you feel like often there is a time limit on doing what you do. Touring. Performing. Recording. There is a voice in your head, tucked way in the back of your mind that’s telling you eventually you’ve gotta grow up. Eventually you gotta get a real job. Maybe you suffer from Peter Pan syndrome? Maybe not? Eventually you’ve gotta stop being a child and do what everyone else does, surrender to the ideas and ideals of many but not of you. So says the firm and resolute voice in your head. Maybe there is something there. Something to surrendering though. On the flip side I do feel like you’ve gotta be a little delusional to do what I do, what any artist type does. Chasing creation and following inspiration. Hopefully growing along the way. I don’t think that’s a bad thing necessarily.

My apologies for rambling.

The truth is: there is no age limit to doing what you love. To learn something new. To start a new career. To going back to school. To finding something that brings you joy. To keep on dreaming. As you get older though there are just different realities you have to contend with. Different limitations. Trade offs. That old saying of working smarter not harder is key. Also as important - acceptance and accepting of where you are, and where you are coming from. How you can use that to inform how you move forward with grace and maturity.

The number of artists I’ve toured with who are in the 50+ age range, and doing it successfully, is a lot more of a constant then I would of thought when I first started DIY touring twelve years ago. Seeing how they do it is almost like a master class unto itself. Keeping in mind that there are also quite a few popular artists who didn’t even get their start till they entered their mid 30s, those old stereotypes of age seem to fall away.

To continue being in tune with that creative spirit requires being present in your current season and not clinging to the seasons of the past. It is then possible to keep moving forward with clarity and perspective.

The above and below are from a recent trip to Big Sur. I haven’t been there in quite a few years. It felt good having a few days to recoup and unplug from everything. To hang in good company, breathing in the brisk December air touched by the towering giants of green. The Henry Miller Library, Pfeiffer Falls, and Point Lobos to name a few.

Another recent addition to my life has been the little cat Spooky. I’ve been fostering him since I got back from tour, he may have feline leukemia but my significant other and I are hoping once he gets the full PCR test, and not the partial, he’ll come back negative. If it wasn’t for his initial test results, you wouldn’t know that was a potential diagnosis. He is seemingly healthy. Growing fast. Eating well, and like most kittens, has an over abundance of energy. He also has some serious puppy energy as well. The way he plays, it’s cute, aggressive and funny. Fast little guy. Fingers crossed he’s okay.

The next thing I’m trying to tackle in the first part of this year are the two solo records I’ve been working on. One since the summer of 2020. That’ll be more of a bedroom indie rock kind of thing. I’ll add a track below, ruff mix, scratch vocals, unfinished and very raw. The other record I started in February of last year. Those songs are newer and my priority is to finish that first. The material is much fresher in my mind as is my excitement surrounding it. However I might be going on tour again with a new band as soon as March. So that’ll impact when I can schedule studio time. Hopefully though that tour happens, it would be a good opportunity. If it does, I’ll update accordingly. A timing game is how a lot of this stuff ends up working out.

Anyhow I’ll check in soon. Hope things for you all have been good so far in 2024. Wishing well. Here is that track I mentioned from one of the records I’m working on. Missing electric guitars and piano. It’s called Waiting On Tomorrow. Enjoy and take care ~ J

Dear reader,

How’s it going? How have you been? I hope things are better then not. I’m still asking myself the same thing and working on an answer.

Our last show for the Rubblebucket tour was a good time. That happened in North Hampton, MA. Beautiful old theater. Tough getting the crowd going. The band though, they are a good bunch. We hit Pennsylvania one last time for a quick gig before making the arduous journey back to California. A band from Lancaster opened the show, Memory Stitches. Their whole thing, music and all, was a nice shake up from where we’d been the past five weeks.

I was told I say hello too much, or a lot. I paused when told this information, gleamed something true there. Must be nerves. People sometimes make me nervous. Sometimes it’s nothing. Sometimes I think there might be something else going on upstairs that I’m unaware of that affects the way I interact with everything. My therapist said I could get it checked out, for a small fee. Declining might of not been good in hindsight but it made my wallet feel better at the time. There is always maybe quite possibly tomorrow. I gotta start therapy again.

Rambling now.

After our last east coast date we had to haul ass about forty hrs to get back to Santa Barbara with the hope of making it in time to spend Thanksgiving with loved ones and the folks we care about. We drove hard for three days and managed to make it in the night before. Pretty late. Unfortunately we got into a bit of a fender bender prior to making into California. Got rear ended by a semi-truck. Thankfully everyone was okay, other then some intense whiplash for a few days. Once the police and paramedics retreated we hit the road again. Van is still thankfully running fine, a little dinged up but all things considered, counting our blessings.

We are now four days into our west coast tour. San Diego, Santa Ana, and Los Angeles were all a lot of fun. Tonight we’re playing in Merced. Tomorrow San Francisco. This part of tour we are co-headlining with an artist named Rudy De Anda.

God, it’s really nice being by the pacific again. I love a lot of different places but not quite like I love the west coast. Something special about it.

I hope everyone’s previous holiday was good and as we go into this next month, hopefully it is as stress free as possible.

Can’t believe it is already the end of 2023. December is here.

Thinking about how I want to do 2024 a little different.

I’m writing lists and checking them twice.

Working on more financial independence, Substack has been helping some with that. Curious to see where it goes. Being able to have a newsletter/blog space where I can also upload lessons, songs, updates about current things going on + whatever else feels right is a nice practice and option. Being able to connect with everyone who has been subscribing and offer up a way for folks who’ve been wanting to support more in some kind of way, is something I’m really grateful for. I can’t thank y’all enough.

We are almost to the venue now for another load in, another sound check and another show. Never played this city before, should be fun .

I’ll check in soon. Now that I’ve have a few days to recalibrate.

Also should I keep growing this beard out?

Alrighty, time to go to work.

Take care till next time.

~ J

Nothing quite like it. Hotel coffee. It’s bitterness and sour flavor leave’s a taste that hangs longer then any other. Cuts into your throat. Diner coffee has a certain charm about it. Gas station coffee is hit or miss, albeit mostly a miss. However nothing comes close, in my humble opinion, to the vaguely dark looking liquid that is pawned off as coffee in hotels and motels across America.

Adding sugar or honey helps a little. I guess that’s the sweet treat.

Well, here we are again dear reader.

Thank you for logging in. Following along. If you got a notification about a “new post” from Cole’s Blog. An email update. I’m grateful you opened the link and thankful for your time.

I’ve been on the road now for well over a month. As fun and enriching as the experience of touring always tends to be, I’m definitely feeling worn out and exhausted. Both psychically and mentally.

Playing music every night is a blessing and something I feel lucky enough right now to be able to do. The band we are on the road with, Rubblebucket, has been great. They’ve been very nice folks and professional. The venues and rooms we’ve been working have been fun. It’s been a pleasure opening for them.

Still though, the road is wearing. Missing my own bed.

Not really enough time in any one place to do much other then load in, play the show, mingle a little, load out, try and get a few hrs of sleep and then hit the road for the next city. The next state. The next stop. The next place we repeat that routine.

Seeing this many places though is always a treat. Despite my current tiredness and grumbling disposition, we’re always experiencing some interesting thing - if only for a little while.

It just tends to blur together. Everything, everywhere, all at once.

We’re officially on the last week of tour. The last leg. The last hurrah. That knowledge is giving me extra energy. An extra charge. Seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Looking forward to being home in California.

This is one of those tours where tone wise I feel like I’ve been making poor decisions. Brought the wrong guitar. Brought the wrong noisemakers. My amp is doing good thankfully, and shout out to my pops for being a big help there, though I’ve learned some things on this tour that make me want to try something with a different sized speaker. Potentially I could convert my Princeton into a 12inch. The integrity of the amp is great. I am just wanting to pair it with something that has a little more bottom end and throatiness. All in all I might tweak things a little more but we do only have six shows left before a brief break.

Back in time for Thanksgiving. Then back out again the following Tuesday for another two weeks.

The guitarist/bassist from Rubblebucket (Stephen Becker) and I have been talking gear, guitar and tones - I’ve been loving his warm sound and fluid phrasing. Sharing some tidbits and experience has been fun. Swapping ideas. Trying each other’s guitars. He has this really nice Nash 52 style Tele. It responds on the fretboard in a way I wish my Fender CS 57 Strat would. There is a slippery quality, while also sticky quality that my guitar has. Switching maybe to a rosewood neck could help? However that Nash Tele has maple as well and I’m not running into the same issue. Hard to say. It has led me on a quest though to reevaluate what makes a “good” Stratocaster. Which of course is quite subjective. So I suppose I only mean this as in, this new information is updating my personal preference’s. Not to sound overly clinical. How the strings slip and feel. How much of a grip one can have. The tension and balance. How free your fingers engage in that dance on the fretboard. Lots to think about.

Living out of a suitcase. Well in my case, more of a duffle bag that was gifted to me by my friend Grey Bear and his partner Adriana. Both beautiful people. Currently though the place we are living is in Baltimore. We’ve been here for a couple of nights, which when doing this type of gig, is a long time in one place. Saw the last bar Edgar Allen Poe supposedly drank at. Some cool cobbled streets. Little Italy had this very good breakfast spot. First place on tour where the eggs and potatoes reminded me of something made with love at home.

We had a rare day off yesterday. Ruben and I decided to head up to New York City and spend some time in Brooklyn. He had tickets to see Vulfpeck and I figured - why not. The other members of the band decided to stay in Maryland to rest, catch up and relax. Which wasn’t a bad idea either. NYC was great though, it’s always a rush being in the Big Apple. We had trouble finding parking, the venue Vulf was playing at was a little more underground. Place’s to park a fifteen passenger van were slim. Still, we caught a chunk of the show. Great to see Cory Wong and Joe Dart do their thing live. Great players of the new funk elite. After the show had worn off we hit a 24 hr diner for a quick bite before we we’re supposed to meet up with our friend for a drink and subsequently crash at our friends place. However he ended up texting later letting us know that he wasn’t feeling well. We changed our plans and decided to impulsively head back to Baltimore, since that’s where our next show was anyways…lots of driving but a fun little side trip.

I’m trying to grow out my beard this tour. A little winter coat if ya please.

I’ve been writing this latest entry in a few different places. From the hotel in Baltimore, to the band van, to a different city now. Sitting outside of a coffee shop typing with the chilly breeze biting at my hands. Doylestown I think? Outside of Philadelphia. Great movie by the way. One of the title tracks from that flick is what helped get me into Springsteen. Secret Garden being the other song that really did it for me. Once I heard that track I finally got on the Bruce train. Long time coming.

Woke up today after crashing on a couch, back is a little stiff. We stayed the night with our record label’s owner. Nice to meet one of the people in person who helped get this last Dante Elephante record out there.

Well I am certainly rambling now. I suppose I’ll just say wherever you are reading this from I hope life is treating you as well as can be. Sending love out there.

Thanks for reading along.

Talk to y’all soon enough.

Cheers ~ J

Dear reader,

I hope this finds you well wherever you are.

We made it to Colorado, staying with our friends in Boulder. Always grateful to the folks who are able to put us traveling music types up for the night. Slept for six hours this time.

My phone is slowly, but not so slowly, on it’s way out. The timing is perfect. I suppose all you can do is count the positives for the day. Though if anyone gets a text from me and it’s all lower case and it sounds like I’m disinterested it is because my phone is dying and it cannot really do proper typing at the moment. Not that my grammar has ever been spectacular...

Brief side note: It is a funny thing how much we infer from a text, a lack of punctuation or too much punctuation, an emoji and so on and so forth. Telecommunications baffle me.

To sum up; I’ll likely need to get a new phone somewhere sometime soon on the road.

Currently drinking an americano with oat milk in some random Starbucks down the way from the passport agency here in Aurora. The music is more on the bad side today. Then again it might just be my mood. After dealing with an appointment mix up and the ensuing experience of dealing with federal bureaucratic song and dance, the word irritable probably applies.

After buttoning up everything on my end prior to getting into town, the agency ended up somehow booking me for Tuscan, AZ. I show up to the department here in Colorado and they cannot find any record of my appointment or any of my information. Our drummer Joey also has some passport business to attend to so we made our appointments for around the same time. Anyhow after much hair pulling and conversation one of the folks working security made the connection that myself and Joey were working/traveling together and let me in. A little more happened but all I can say is after that experience, I’m damn happy to report I’ll be picking up my new passport here in forty five minutes. I do wonder though about how arbitrary a lot of their procedures are.

Besides just generally trying to survive and the normal stresses of the road this was the last big thing to take care of before Canada. I don’t want to speak too soon but it is looking like the passport drama has come to a conclusion.

Tonight we are playing a show in Denver. Our friend Emma will be sitting in on keys and vocals. Looking forward to that. We’ve toured together before and she’s a great musician. While we don’t have our regular keyboardist for this run it is nice to have some additional support, even if just for the night.

We have some new songs we’re working on currently. It’ll be nice working those out in the set.

I need to change my strings.

This americano ain’t too bad. Say what you will about Starbucks but at least it is consistent. You know what you’re getting and what you’re not. That said, I’m always keeping an eye out for a local spot with killer espresso. I have few vices but coffee is definitely one. Much to my stomach’s dismay.

The cat pictured above is Eve. New friend. The folks we are staying with adopted her recently. Despite being allergic, I do really love cats. Hopefully I’ll be adopting one over the holidays. We’ll see.

Time to go, I’ll check in soon though. Colorado Springs tomorrow. Wishing well. Sending love. Xoxo.

Thanks for reading and thank you to all who’ve recently subscribed!

If you feel compelled, please like, share or comment. Those little actions go a long way in continuing to help this to grow. Very grateful to y’all for the support so far and for following along! That means a ton.

Take care and talk to y’all soon ~ J

Quietly typing from our hotel room sipping on a bad cup of coffee in Beaver, Utah. First stop after a long but pleasant nine hour drive.

Officially on the road again.

It’s quite possible I enjoyed four hrs of sleep but now its time to get a move on it. The bed and shower were, and always will be, a welcome addition to any tour. As usual, sleep is scattered but I should try and get more later on in the van if possible. Real sleep doesn’t happen when moving though, just broken dreams and the occasional dozing off into exhaustion. However, something always keeps you moving.

It is not as popular culture would have you believe, drugs, sex and rock n’ roll - though the rock n’ roll is motivating…A sense of getting to where you’ve never been, some kind of wild adventure, connection, not knowing what’s around the corner, chasing the music and experience is closer to what keeps you going. Honestly I think Willie Nelson still had it right. His lyrics make the most sense.

The new tour van is handling well. Compared to others, this might be the most normal driving one to date. Thank god for that.

Our first stop on tour is in Denver, Colorado at this place called Black Buzzard. We’ve got another eight hrs of road between us and the gig. We’ll be playing a couple warm up shows before meeting up with our bass player in Ohio. Ruben will be filling in temporarily on the four strings till then.

Listening to Bad Sneakers by: Steely Dan at the moment. Thankfully I remembered to pack some.

Filling up on gas and then finding some better coffee before moving on to the next city and state.

Hope everyone is doing good out there and back home, I know these are rather tumultuous times. Wishing y’all well as can be. Very grateful to all of you for subscribing and following along. The musicians life ain’t always the easiest thing but your interest and support really helps keep the lights on and moving along. It ain’t something I take for granted. Thank you kindly.

I suppose before I leave you for today I’ll leave you with these words Bob Dylan said a while back. “Yesterday’s just a memory, tomorrow is never what it’s supposed to be.”

Talk to y’all soon, take care.

~ J

Dear reader,

I hope this finds you well. Hows life been? Good? Moderate? Teetering on bad? It seems like things these days have a rather chaotic component surrounding them. Maybe thats more internal then external though…Who knows.

For myself, and as I mentioned a couple posts back, I’m getting ready to head on out on a national tour (plus Canada) again with Dante Elephante. Leaving in just a short few days. There are always some nerves before hand. Some excitement. Some trepidation.

Before I head out this Tuesday I wanted to just do a brief check in. Extend my gratitude towards everyone thats subscribed recently and that has some interest in following along. Very grateful to y’all!

Right now I’m wrapping up lessons, packing up gear and then heading to a local business to entertain folks sipping on wine or beer for the evening. What I tend to call a ‘day job’ type gig. I’m grateful for the work but it is a different kind of environment and takes a very different kind of discipline providing a mood or am·bi·ence. Always a good time to practice new material. Exercising your brain in another way.

Tomorrow I’m excited to be recording some guitar for my friend Jess Bush. If I could, I’d spend all of my time in the studio. Then Sunday I’m playing one last time before hitting the road. It’ll be the last central coast gig for the next couple months.

This past week has been hectic but powering through and trying to just get done what I can and let go of the rest. Also I’m trying hard to keep in mind what my therapist has told me quite a few times; Don’t be afraid to Pump The Brakes.

Next time I write it’ll likely be from the van heading towards Colorado, first stop Denver. Till then I’m wishing you a good weekend and week ahead.

Here is a quick musical idea I had, wanted to share - maybe it’ll be a song someday.

Take care and talk soon ~ J

Upcoming Dates:

10/13/23 - Old Town Wine and Brew, Orcutt CA (solo) 6:30 to 9pm

10/15/23 - 805 Charcuterie, Santa Maria CA (solo) 2 to 5pm

Dear reader,

Do you ever have that feeling of “I know I did several things today but I’m not sure what I did, or if it was enough”? Enough being never and the feeling unrelentingly present as you try to pursue a far away action, something distant as your mind goes vacant, your shoulders slouch and your stomach craves a certain soothing something.

I’m waiting on the water to boil. The day has already been spent. Tea sounds like a good idea. Fall is here. I can’t believe we are already in the month of October. To pause and reflect - it has been a busy year, in a way it makes sense that we’re already entering another season. So much has happened in such a short period of time. Is ten months short? I guess it’s all relative.

Thank you to all the folks who have been keeping up, subscribing and following along. Welcome to anyone new, I sure appreciate you.

Monday’s are generally a day I try to take off and unplug. Reset. Figure out how to tackle the week. Catch up if I need to. Most of the time I do. Today I just felt like I couldn’t quite get around to everything I needed to address. More then a few things needed attention. What I should be doing is finding little moments of peace, but to pause and take a breath has been a little more difficult these past few weeks. My therapist though would say to just pump the brakes. Those are good words. Words I’ve been trying to keep in mind. Times being as they are, that feels harder to do.

Water boiled. Drinking peppermint tea now.

Maybe the trick to being an adult and living in this world is realizing that there is always going to be something to do, something to accomplish, and that you just have to learn to pace things as best you can. My skills aren’t really that varied and stopping to smell the roses is certainly one I keep needing to re-read the manual on. Maybe that’s just how some folks are wired. Now that’s not to say that I can’t be lazy, I definitely can - I used to ping pong between doing too much, burning the candle at both ends or being completely exhausted and not capable of any action. I’ve slowly learned how to swing with a little more grace, but it’s a lesson I’m still learning.

On that note here is one of my favorites from Leonard Cohen:

I Can’t Break The Code

I can’t break the code of our frozen love. It’s too late to know what the password was.

I reach for the past, keep coming up short. And everything feels like a last resort.

Tho’ we’ve called it quits and there’s nothing left. Still I hear my lips, make these promises.

Though we’ve squandered the truth and there’s little left. We can still sweep the room. We can still make the bed.

When the world is false, I won’t say its true. When the darkness calls I will go with you.

In a time of shame, in the great alarm. When they call your name, we’ll go arm in arm…

Thank you dear reader, hope your week is off to a good start.

Cheers ~ J

Normally I would be journaling about this time - so this may feel more like a stream of thought - fresh off a cup of coffee - tangle of words - kinda thing.

Happy Friday all. Thank you again to all the recent subscribers. That support is what keeps the lights on. Grateful.

Currently I’m going through my pre-tour check list. Making sure all my gear is working the way it needs to. That my guitar is set-up well enough for what I need out of it. Deciding on which guitar to tour with since its too much at this point to take two. Letting go of gear I don’t need. Like anything. The constant addition or subtraction of such is almost like a drug addiction. Gear Acquisition Syndrome, or G.A.S. as its become commonly known among musician types…it can be a real problem. One thankfully I only have a mild case of and not a chronic condition. Slimming things down to just what you need is something one always finds desirable when living out of a van, but something that takes a little practice.

This past year I’ve been staying busy recording more then anything, while playing a lot of solo shows to help fund the recording process further. Both two solo records, one from the summer/fall of 2020 and another one from the start of this year. I tend to record and let material sit - then by the time I can afford to finish it I have written new material so I start recording and focusing more on that. Collectively I probably have material hanging around and unreleased since 2014. Maybe further back…These unfinished tracks though as well as current works will be something I share over time with paid subscribers on this platform. Excited for that.

With Dante Elephante, we’ve also been busy working on new material and recording. We cut a live record back in April at Soho (in Santa Barbara, CA) with Grey Bear Erickson. That was a fun process. Currently that album is being mixed. Along with the video from the show. We’ve also done some fly dates in the midwest, Noise pop, and other various activities to keep ourselves loose.

As of now we are about to head out on a national tour with Rubblebucket, Husbands and Rudy De Anda.

I’ll keep on updating you from the road as to happenings and such.

Damn, I need to get my passport figured out. We’re going to Canada.

Anyhow I’ve gotta get ready for some guitar lessons now. Appreciate y’all. Thanks for reading and I hope you have a pleasant weekend!

Cheers ~ J

Howdy friends and new subscribers,

Sitting here sipping on some tea before the rest of my day’s guitar lesson’s start up again. The tea is herbal as I’ve already reached my caffeine quota. I might be shaking a little too much right now.

First off - I’m very grateful to everyone who has subscribed here on this new platform. Your interest and support in what I do means a ton - very grateful to you! I’m excited to be sharing more freely and unencumbered the things I’ve been up to besides the things you may know...Instagram has been my main hub for some time in getting the word out (yes) and building an audience (also grateful), but here on Substack - the multi-dimensional newsletter/blog space feels better and makes sense for the direction I want to go. Something more akin to what a late 90s website was.

I aim to give you more of a play by play behind the scenes type beat. Whether that be music, demos, songs, lessons, gig updates, entries from the road, answering questions, a first look at new material, random thoughts, input from you and more.

To those of you that are just joining; I’ll be making both public posts and posts for my paid subs weekly. I welcome any comments, likes and shares. All of these things go really far towards helping get the word out and towards helping this whole endeavor sustain and grow.

Thank you very much for your time and interest, means a lot!

~ J

Upcoming dates:

Sept 29th 2023 - The Marriott, Buellton CA (solo set)

Sept 30th 2023 - Savory and Sweet Eats, Lompoc CA (solo set)

Oct 7th 2023 - Microsoft Theatre, Los Angeles CA (playing w/Dante Elephante)

Oct 12th 2023 - The Wicked Shamrock, Lompoc CA (Hosting Songwriter Night)

Oct 13th 2023 - Old Town Wine and Brew, Orcutt CA (solo set)

Oct 15th 2023 - 805 Charcuterie, Santa Maria CA (solo set)

Then hitting the road for tour with Dante Elephante